Last week, I was talking about schedules and getting back into a routine. I have pretty high expectations (or perhaps low patience?) when it comes to our boys. I am pretty bossy for sure. Bossy about how they clean up, how much effort is put into things they are working on, bossy about how they treat people (and themselves). Bossy about being considerate.
As I am writing this out it makes me chuckle a bit since the word ‘bossy’ seems counter productive to what I want them to learn – being considerate, treating people (and themselves) well and not giving up on what they want. Maybe I should remove the term ‘ bossy’ and focus on having ‘reasonable expectations’ instead. They are kids and they are learning. I have to remember I can’t put so much on them all the time or expect them to learn the lesson the first time.
Our older boy has just started high school this year as I have mentioned before, and with that comes changing hormones and more freedom as the Grade 8’s are allowed to leave the school grounds (high school used to start in Grade 9 in our school district, but that changed a few years ago). It has been a roller coaster of emotions during the busy days which can feel exhausting. As I work a short walking distance from the school, I have told him if something comes up that he needs something, he can come and see me. I teasingly told him, if he does come to me for money, he better bring me a tea from Tim Horton’s 😉.
The very next day he did.
Jordan knew I was having a bad morning since we finally hooked up our washer and dryer again after THREE WEEKS while the drywall was being done, and then I discovered the dryer wasn’t heating. The laundry was just tumbling and tumbling and not drying at all. He knew I was stressed and he walked into my work with a tea on his lunch break that day. I should mention, he used all the change he had to do so, and then the time to do this used most of his lunch, so I did give him some change for him to get himself something on his way back.
This day, my heart melted.
Making expectations reasonable is important for all the trying times but knowing the boys are caring people and considerate means something is going right 😊. I still work on my patience every day. I have to think of the big picture, breathe, and think of their kind hearts when I am frustrated with moods.
Xo,
Devon
I look forward to your posts each week Devon. I find there is always something worthwhile to think about. Thank you.
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