Remember when you were a kid, and you would look at adults meeting for coffee to ‘talk’ and you would think, how dreadfully boring. They aren’t even playing, they are just talking. How can that be entertaining?
Fast forward a few decades, and my friend and I had so much to talk about Friday night, that we continued walking in the loop we were on for 1 hour, 45 minutes. Over 10,000 steps (I can’t say exactly as my fitbit relies on my arm swinging, and I had to switch arms for carrying my tea occasionally).
We talked about how my son has some friends who have siblings, and they just hate each other. They don’t get along, they don’t agree, they can’t compromise or play together. It is so discouraging to my boy that it has come up in conversation on more than one occasion. it’s hard for him to watch, to understand and to be around. He and his little brother do have their moments and occasional spats. But overall, they adore each other and always have. Are my husband and I just lucky parents? I don’t know, and I perhaps never will. I can tell you, we are hard on our boys if they are rude to each other, if they are unkind. If they don’t show compassion. I notice those things right away, and correct it. That is only a piece of the puzzle though.
When I contemplate on this topic, I can’t help but think of a quote that I have seen going around since Black Lives Matter. It says: ‘I promise to teach my babies to love your babies.’
I stand by this, and do teach my boys to show compassion and kindness to others. But if siblings in some families aren’t being taught to love each other? To share? To not scream at each other? To not rip the Xbox controller from his brother’s hand? That worries me. When I first saw this quote, me with my rose-coloured glasses on, thought, ‘yes, amazing.’ And then when my kids come home and tell about sibling rivalries and that it bothers them, I feel discouraged along with them.
And then I think of Mother Theresa and her advice ~ ‘If you want to change the world, go home and love your family.’
Again (I shared this quote on my June 11, 2019 blog post), how true this is. I think teaching kids to love other kids is a lot easier if they are first taught how to love, and how to be kind. My two sisters and I loved each other as kids, and still do. I had always liked to think this was normal. Perhaps my sisters and I are just blessed with winning personalities (I’m kidding).
We need so much kindness and love in this world! Perhaps sibling love is a secret formula, and our boys are doing something right. For that, I am very thankful.